|
Author
|
Comment
|
cmoore0013
Unregistered User
(4/2/06 3:57 pm)
|
first 30 minutes of my Cinderella script need approval!
OK. so here are the first 30 minutes of the script, it's a musical, so you will see when the songs come in. They are obviously not original songs, so don't take points off for that, but our spins on them will be much different than what you would think. I need opinions before I continue with it. Any ideas and questions are welcome. Thank you!
Cinderella: The Girl of The Ashes
By
Chris Moore
Adapted from the story by
The Brothers Grimm
FADE IN:
BLACK SCREEN
And in the darkness, the building sound of rain gets louder
and louder and then a BANG!
SMASH UP ON:
EXT. GRAVEYARD- DAY
We see ELLA TRICKLAY, a young, dark haired girl of 16 staring at
space in the downpour.
ELLA
(VOICE)
My name is Ella Tricklay. My life as I know it is falling apart.
INT. TRICKLAY HOUSE (LIVING ROOM) - DUSK
ELLA, LADY GLENDA, EMMA, and GEMMA enter. They are all dressed in black.
ELLA sits at a chair. EMMA and GEMMA sit on a large, pink couch as LADY GLENDA stands. ELLA removes her shawl, revealing tears.
ELLA
I can’t believe my father is gone.
GLENDA
Don’t be so selfish! You know as well as I do that he will be sorely missed by all of us.
ELLA
I never said that! I was just sayi…
GLENDA
That is enough gloom for one day!
EMMA
You should learn to shut your mouth.
GEMMA
Yes, is it that hard to do?
ELLA frowns and sighs.
ELLA
(VOICE)
You see? The older woman is my stepmother, Lady Glenda. She is currently trying to work her way up the financial and social ladder. The one on the left side of the couch is Emma. Emma is as beautiful as a flower, but as poisonous as arsenic. The other to the right is Gemma. Gemma has a tongue like a serpent and the sexual drive of a prostitute.
GLENDA
We must do something about this situation.
ELLA
What is there to do?
GLENDA
I thought I told you to be quiet.
ELLA
No, you told me to stop being gloomy.
EMMA
That’s the same thing, whore!
GLENDA
EMMA! A real lady never talks that way, now does she?
EMMA
Define a real lady.
GLENDA
(furious)
A lady who does not say WHORE!
(turns to ELLA)
So, whore, I want you to do all the cooking!
ELLA
I will if you call me a civilized name. And you wonder where Emma gets her vocabulary from?
GLENDA
You will answer to whatever I damn well wish to call you if you want to remain in my house!
ELLA
Your house? This is my father’s house!
GLENDA
Well, he’s dead! The house and whatever is inside of it is my property. That includes, to my great horror, his daughter.
ELLA
Well, he left me, to my great horror, you three!
LADY GLENDA slaps ELLA hard, causing her to lunge back.
GLENDA
You sit down!
ELLA sits back in her chair and looks over to see the cold, cruel stares of EMMA and GEMMA.
GLENDA
Now, if we want to keep this house together, we must all pitch in. So, Ella, you will be in charge of cooking and cleaning. Emma, you are to relax, wear fashionable clothing, and occasionally answer the door.
EMMA
NO! I’m not answering any door!
GLENDA
Fine, Ella will do it. Gemma, you will be in charge of bathing yourself, maintaining a striking countenance, and brushing you own hair. And lastly, the waxing, sweeping, mopping, gardening, windows, washing, and every thing else including laundry will be done by Ella. Any questions?
ELLA raises her hand.
GLENDA
Yes?
ELLA
I don’t try to be rude, but this arrangement is a little lopsided.
GLENDA
How so?
ELLA
It just seems like I have everything to do.
GLENDA
Well, I’m not finished. I forgot to mention that I am in charge of…being in charge.
ELLA
That’s typical. I suppose you’ll just sleep all day, like the diabolic duo over there.
GLENDA
I am getting tired of your smart ass comments. Since, I am now legally your guardian; you must obey my every single wish and command. Now, I command you to work.
ELLA
What if I don’t obey?
GLENDA
There is always the orphanage.
ELLA
I’ll find someplace else.
GLENDA
Keep wishing. Keep wishing that someone will take you away from here, because Lord knows I’ve wished that someone would take you away. Now work!
LADY GLENDA, EMMA, and GEMMA make for a quick exit, leaving ELLA all alone in the living room.
ELLA
(VOICE)
And work I did. Every day, day in and day out, I was responsible for every single household chore imaginable, and then some.
INT. ELLA’S BEDROOM- DAY
ELLA enters her room, but is stopped by LADY GLENDA.
GLENDA
What do you think you are doing?
ELLA
I’m tired. It’s been a long day.
GLENDA
I don’t care. I’ve heard of your airs and graces and the way you’ve been spoiled. I want you to know that that will come to an end this VERY instant. You have been to school, yes?
ELLA
Yes.
GLENDA
Don’t they teach you to say madam when you speak to elders?
ELLA
Why are you doing this? I tried to be nice to you and your daughters, but I’ve given up! You never loved my father, you greedy bitch!
LADY GLENDA grabs ELLA and drags her across the floor as EMMA and GEMMA watch joyfully.
GLENDA
We will not have you pampered. I will see if I am the mistress of my own house or not. Emma? Gemma? Go pick out a the plainest dress you can find for this child. This is no longer YOURE room. This is my room and my house! Emma and Gemma will now have this room all to their selves.
EMMA and GEMMA return with an ugly, brown dress. They toss it at ELLA.
The three walk away.
INT. LADY GLENDA’S ROOM- DAY
LADY GLENDA shuts and locks her door and sits in the chair by her mirror.
She stares at her reflection and starts to sing.
GLENDA:
What is this feeling,
So sudden and new?
INT. KITCHEN- DAY
ELLA begins to put on the brown dress, as she sings.
LOATHING
ELLA
I felt the moment
I laid eyes on YOU!
GLENDA
My pulse is rushing.
ELLA
My head is reeling
GLENDA
My face is flushing.
BOTH:
What it he feeling?
Ferment as a flame.
Does it have a name?
Yes.
Loathing!
Unadulterated loathing.
GLENDA
For your face.
ELLA
Your voice.
GLENDA
Your clothing.
BOTH
Let’ just say.
We loath it all!
Every little trait
However small
Makes my very flesh begin to crawl
With simple utter loathing
It’s a strange exhilar-ation
In such total de-test-at-ion
It’s so pure
So strong
Though I do admit it came on fast
Still I do believe that it came on fast
And I will be loathing
Loathing you my whole life long
EMMA and GEMMA
Dear Glenda
You are just too good.
How do you stand it?
I don’t think I could
She’s a terror
She’s a tyrant
We don’t mean to show a bias
But Glenda you’re a martyr.
GLENDA
Well, these things are sent to try us.
EMMA and GEMMA
Poor Glenda forced to resign
With some one to disgusting and divine
We just want to tell you,
We’re all on your side
We share your loathing.
ELLA and GLENDA:
What is this feeling so sudden and new
I felt the moment I laid eyes on YOU!
My pulse is rushing
My head is reeling
Let’s just say
We loath it all!
Ohh, what is this feeling?
Does it have a name.
YEEEEEESSSS!
LOATHING!
It’s so pure so strong.
Though I do admit It came eon fast
Still I do believe that it can last
And I will be loathing
Loathing, truly deeply
Loathing, truly forever
Loathing YOUUUU!
My whole life long!
INT. DINNING ROOM- NIGHT
ELLA enters. Her face is smudged with ash. LADY GLENDA makes a cruel face.
GLENDA
Is that all?
ELLA
Yes.
GLENDA
Then why are you still here? Run along!
ELLA walks out as LADY GLENDA, EMMA, and GEMMA begin to eat.
INT. KITCHEN- NIGHT
ELLA sits; petting her doxen RUFUS s she gazes out at the stars.
ELLA
(voice)
With my room given to those two tramps, I was forced t sleep in the kitchen, with my pet dog Rufus. I didn’t mind it though. It was the best time of the day, actually. I loved the night, the peace and quiet. It was all I had to look forward to, but then I was brought back with the awful sounds of their laughter and I knew it was me they were laughing at. As I slept, the ashes went into my hair and onto my face, giving me my nickname…Cinderella.
INT. KITCHEN- MORNING
ELLA awakes, with RUFUS as he licks her face. She smiles and gets
up from her position and goes to the stove. There is a montage of
ELLA’S cooking disasters.
ELLA
(voice)
Every morning was the same. I woke up with Rufus and I would start making breakfast. My first few days, I was lucky if I could get a damn egg scrambled, let alone a hash brown for the grease sisters.
INT. EMMA/ GEMMA’S ROOM- MORNING
ELLA enters with a tray and sets it down next to EMMA and GEMMA’S bed. ELLA touches GEMMA’S side of the bed.
ELLA
Wake up Gemma.
GEMMA
Go away! I’ m sleeping. Don’t wake up Emma either.
ELLA leaves the tray and exits.
INT. LADY GLENDA’S ROOM- MORNING
ELLA enters with a tray for LADY GLENDA. She opens the canopy and sets LADY GLENDA’S tray next to her. LADY GLENDA grabs ELLA’S arm.
GLENDA
What are you doing?
ELLA
Just giving you your breakfast, mam.
GLENDA
Oh. O.K. fine.
ELLA
Enjoy.
GLENDA
Aren’t you forgetting something?
ELLA
But today is only Tuesday, you told me to say it ever…
GLENDA
I think I need you to say it every morning.
ELLA
(sarcastic)
Oh Lady Glenda, you’re getting younger everyday.
GLENDA
Thank you, Ella. Off with you!
EXT. GRAVEYARD- DAY
ELLA approaches her mother and father’s grave with a bouquet of flowers in her hand. A tree has grown behind it.
ELLA
(voice)
My mother and father’s grave was the only grave I could think of that had a fine tree growing out of it. Many people said it was some type of magic. I went there every day.
ELLA stops and kneels by the grave, dropping the flowers off as she begins to sing.
ONCE I WAS LOVED
ELLA:
Once I was loved
I knew I was loved
I flew through my days
In fanciful ways
Secure and sure they’d always be
Endless love
For me
Gone is that love
My fanciful dove
Has tears in her eyes
She no longer flies
And yet
My heart will not despair
For it’s there
Just a memory away
Once I was loved
So always come what may
Love’s happy memory
Every
Will
Be
Lov-ing me
ELLA dries her tears and slowly gets up from the grave.
INT. TRICKLAY HOUSE (ENTRY HALL)- DAY
ELLA opens the door and enters. LADY GLENDA stands right there, waiting for her.
ELLA
Yes?
GLENDA
Where were you?
ELLA
At my parent’s grave, just like always.
GLENDA
Of course. Always dwelling in the past. It’s healthier if we live in the future and right at this very moment, there are two beautiful girls in there room who are waiting for a certain someone to apply their make up.
ELLA
Of course.
GLENDA
Of course is right! After that, we would like to have a nice, outdoor lunch.
ELLA
Alright. I’ll get on it.
INT. EMMA/GEMMA’S ROOM- DAY
ELLA looks in the mirror as she applies GEMMA’S make up.
GEMMA
Try not to make me look like a floozy like you did yesterday.
ELLA
That wasn’t my fault. It just sort of happened. Besides, you picked out the colors.
GEMMA
Those were very practical colors.
ELLA
They were blue and pink.
GEMMA
Like I said, they were practical.
The camera pans over to EMMA who is lying on the white, half-bed eating chocolates.
EMMA
These are simply heavenly.
GEMMA
They are.
EMMA
How would you know?
GEMMA
I tried them.
EMMA
Go figure. If it’s edible, you’ll try it.
GEMMA
What are you getting at?
EMMA
Nothing but the truth.
ELLA
You two stop this. Does that look good, Gemma?
GEMMA takes a good, long look at herself in the mirror.
GEMMA
No, I want bolder colors.
ELLA sighs and whips out the blue and pink.
EXT. PATIO- DAY
LADY GLENDA, EMMA, and GEMMA sit out on the patio, sipping tea. ELLA enters with three trays of fish sticks.
GLENDA
What the hell are these?
ELLA
It’s something my grandmother used to fix me as a child. They’re called fish sticks.
GEMMA
Oh, fish sticks! My favorite! They look wonderful.
EMMA
Go figure!
GLENDA
They are atrocious! Ella, go back in there and make me a bowl of the finest soup you can make.
ELLA
Very well.
INT. KITCHEN- DAY
ELLA stirs the soup bowl on the stove and spits into it. She stirs it around.
ELLA
Serves you right!
EXT. PATIO- DAY
ELLA walks out with the bowl of soup. She sets it across from LADY GLENDA. ELLA watches with glee as LADY GLENDA greedily sips the soup.
ELLA
Is it good?
GLENDA
Lovely. At least you can do something right.
As EMMA looks up at ELLA, GEMMA steals fish sticks from her plate and greedily stuffs them into her mouth. ELLA exits.
INT. TRICKLAY HOUSE (ENTRY HALL)- DAY
ELLA scrubs the floor as LADY GLENDA, EMMA, and GEMMA all dressed in their Sunday best walk to the front door.
GLENDA
We are leaving.
ELLA
To where?
GEMMA
Shut up. Do what you were doing!
GLENDA
That’s none of your business. Expect us to be back an hour before nightfall. I expect this house to be spick and span. Understand?
ELLA
I always do.
GLENDA
Good. I’m also expecting a nice, hot supper waiting for us when we return.
ELLA
You know I’ll have it ready.
GLENDA
Good!
The three exit and ELLA sticks the sponge back it the water bucket and walks away.
INT. KITCHEN- DAY
ELLA enters the kitchen and sits in her small, brown chair by the fire.
ELLA
I just need some time to rest.
IN MY OWN LITTLE CORNER
I’m as mild and as meek as a mouse.
When I hear a command I obey.
But I know of a spot in my house
Where no one can stand in my way
In my own little corner
In my own little chair
I can be whatever I want to be
On the wings of my fancy I can fly anywhere
And the world will open its arms to me
I’m a young Norwegian princess or a milk maid
I’m the greatest premadonna in Milan
I’m an heiress who has always had her silk made
By her own flock of silk worms in Japan
I’m a girl men go mad for love’s a game I can play
In a cool and confident kind of air
Just as long as I stay in my own little corner
All alone in my won little chair.
I can be whatever I want to be.
I’m a slave in Calcutta
I’m a queen in Peru
I’m a mermaid dancing upon the sea
I’m a huntress on an African safari
It’s a dangerous type of sport and yet it’s fun
In the night, I sally forth to seek my quarry
And I find I forgot to bring my gun
I am lost in the jungle
All alone and unarmed
When I meet a lioness in her lair
Then I’m glad to b back in my own little corner
All alone in my own little chair
ELLA stops singing and tends to the fire. She pets RUFUS and then exits the kitchen.
EXT. GRAVEYARD- DAY
ELLA enters carrying a bouquet of flowers. She lies them down on her parent’s grave and sit by it.
ELLA
I guess I’ll just spend the rest of my time with you two.
ELLA waits for a little while and then gets back up, kissing the gravestone before she leaves.
INT. TRICKLAY HOUSE- DAY
ELLA washes the floor on her hands and knees. RUFUS comes up. ELLA pets him a RUFUS kisses her.
ELLA
Oh Rufus, I wish you could help, but I don’t think you can.
The front door opens, revealing LADY GLENDA, EMMA, and GEMMA. ELLA puts the sponge back into the bucket.
GLENDA
What on earth is that creature doing on my floors?
ELLA
He’s just here to keep me company.
GLENDA
THAT’S IT! Get up! GET UP!
EMMA
Help us with our bags, Cinderslut!
GEMMA
Be useful for once!
ELLA
Oh I forgot how useful a day of shopping can be.
GLENDA
Hold your tongue.
INT. EMMA/GEMMA’S ROOM- DAY
EMMA and GEMMA enter first and then ELLA follows with at least 5 bags, one in her mouth by the strings.
EMMA
Put them on the bed.
ELLA puts them on the bed, one after the other and then stands there.
EMMA
Waiting for a god damn tip?
GEMMA
Go away!
ELLA exits the room as EMMA and GEMMA laugh and sit on the bed.
GEMMA
Oh, did you see that dreamy piece of manly meat at the village today?
EMMA
Which one?
GEMMA
Oh, you know which one!
EMMA
Refresh my memory.
GEMMA
The one next to Albert.
EMMA
Did you have to bring up Albert?
GEMMA
I thought you were over that.
EMMA
I am.
GEMMA
Is someone starting to miss Albert?
EMMA
NEVER! We’re over. That was 8 years down the drain.
GEMMA
Haha! We’ll anyway this man was so unbelievable. I remember that we had eyes at Lady Charlottes’ ball last spring.
EMMA
In your dreams, Gemma.
GEMMA
I’m telling you, we had eyes!
EMMA
They are filthy pigs. All of them.
GEMMA
But it sure is fun to roll around in the mud with them.
WHAT DID I EVER SEE IN HIM?
EMMA:
8 years
8 years
That’s how long I wasted on him
That’s all
I’m through
Albert dear, to put it sweetly
TO HELL WITH YOU!
What did I ever see in him?
How could I ever think that he was nice?
Take it from me I’ve paid an awful price
What did I ever see in him?
Is he tender?
No, he’s not!
Is he thoughtful?
No, he’s not!
Am I crazy? What’s he got that I found so damn appealing?
What did he ever do for me?
Well, to be honest, he was sometimes nice
But still it wasn’t worth the awful price
It was rough from the start
Broken dates
Broken nails
Broken hearts
What did I ever?
Why did I ever?
What did I ever?
EMMA AND GEMMA:
Do we need them?
No, we don’t!
Do we want them?
No, we don’t!
GEMMA:
Will we leave them?
EMMA:
No, we won’t!
Tell me what did I say that for?
EMMA AND GEMMA:
What did we ever see in them?
How could we ever think that they were nice?
Take it from us we’ve paid an awful price.
It was rough
From the start
Broken dates
Broken nails
Broken hearts
What did we ever see
In
Them!
EMMA and GEMMA collapse on the bed in exhaustion.
INT. KTCHEN– MORNING
ELLA stands, looking at the camera.
ELLA
Today is my birthday. Usually, one is expected to receive cards, cakes, or presents. Me? No, I get nothing. Not even a @#%$ Happy Birthday, Ella! My life officially sucks.
ELLA stirs some pots on the stove.
ELLA
Better yet, I’m still stuck doing chores. That could have been their present to me. No chores, but it seems like I have even more to do. It’s almost as if they know it’s my birthday and they are determined to make it the worst one yet.
ELLA gets three bowls down and pours soup into them from the stove.
ELLA
Things will get much worse before they get better.
LADY GLENDA enters the kitchen. ELLA turns around.
GLENDA
We are leaving. I see that you have found some lunch for yourself.
ELLA
Yes, I have.
GLENDA
Good. Expect us back by nightfall.
ELLA
Alright.
GLENDA
Try not to burn the house down.
ELLA
Have I ever?
GLENDA
I suppose not.
LADY GLENDA exits. ELLA dumps the soup out into the sink and we have a montage of ELLA making and then baking a cake. ELLA takes the cake out and ices it. She puts it on a plate and inserts a small candle in the center.
EXT. GRAVEYARD – DAY
ELLA sits by her parents graves. She lights the candle with a match and then sings Happy Birthday. JOHN, a young man of 16 spies from a distance. He looks intrigued. ELLA begins to cut her cake with a small knife. She cuts two pieces for her mother and father.
ELLA
Here you are mother. Father. I’m so glad you could be with me today. You two are the only ones who remembered my birthday.
ELLA eats her piece of cake as JOHN approaches.
JOHN
It would be a shame to waste it.
ELLA
Waste what?
JOHN
The cake.
ELLA
It would wouldn’t it?
JOHN
Do you mind?
ELLA
Mind what?
JOHN
I’ve had a long walk and I haven’t eaten since breakfast.
ELLA
Breakfast was only a few hours ago.
JOHN
Are you saying that it isn’t possible for someone to become hungry after a few hours?
ELLA
Not exactly. Fine, I’d like the company.
JOHN
Just one question?
ELLA
I guess you’re not that hungry, are you?
JOHN
Yes, I am.
ELLA
Then why the questions?
JOHN
Are you crazy?
ELLA
Depends on who you ask.
JOHN
Oh, is that right?
ELLA
You sure are wasting time. Do you want the cake or not?
JOHN
I think so.
ELLA
Well, then sit down!
JOHN hesitates.
ELLA
What is it now? Afraid to get your clothes dirty?
JOHN
As a matter of fact I am, cause if I do then my parents will know where I’ve been.
ELLA
What would that matter?
JOHN
It matters to my parents.
ELLA
What are they the king and queen?
JOHN looks ELLA in the eye.
ELLA
Oh no!!!! You’re kidding me! Oh God! Oh! Oh! I can’t believe it.
JOHN
Relax.
ELLA
Relax? I’m with the prince and you’re telling me to relax?
JOHN
Yes, I am!
ELLA
I’m sorry; you must get this a lot.
JOHN
Every-damn-day!
ELLA
Sorry! You want your cake now?
JOHN
I have to ask, though.
ELLA
Dear God, I’m this close to eating your piece for you.
JOHN
Why do you have a cake in a graveyard and who in God’s name were you talking to?
ELLA
I was talking to my parents.
JOHN
Your parents?
ELLA
I guess it’s silly, but they’re the only ones I can talk to.
JOHN
They’re dead.
ELLA
I know, but that doesn’t men they can’t hear me. There’s another world after this one, you know.
JOHN
I’m aware of that.
ELLA
I just hate to be alone on my birthday.
JOHN
Birthday, huh?
ELLA
Yes. My stepfamily doesn’t care. They don’t remember it. They probably never knew.
JOHN
Well, they sound like awful people. Come with me.
ELLA
What?
JOHN reaches out his hand. ELLA takes it.
JOHN
I’m going to take you somewhere. Bring the cake with you.
JOHN leads ELLA out of the graveyard.
EXT. CASTLE – DAY
ELLA and JOHN sneak by the castle.
ELLA
Oh, how wonderful. I’ve never seen the palace up close before.
JOHN
Yeah, well first time for everything.
INT. JOHN’S CHAMBER – DAY
JOHN opens the large door to his chamber. ELLA looks on in wonderment. JOHN quickly shuts the door.
ELLA
Wow! Now this I could get used to.
JOHN
I’m numbed to all of it. That’s why I try to get away so much. Everything here has become too normal.
ELLA
Normal? My God, I could never find this normal. It’s beautiful, it’s amazing, it’s...abnormal
JOHN
I’m torn between taking that as a compliment or an insult.
ELLA
Compliment.
|
melusine
Unregistered User
(4/5/06 2:30 pm)
|
script
Good job! very... different. Good luck.
|
cmoore0013
Unregistered User
(4/5/06 3:07 pm)
|
thanks
Thank you. I was certainly trying to make it as different as possible.
|
Veronica Schanoes
Registered User
(4/5/06 4:47 pm)
|
loathing
Are you going to be able to get the rights to use the Loathing song
from Wicked? Won't they make you pay through the nose?
I'm not a fan of the "sex drive of a prostitute," because a) having a strong sex drive doesn't = evil to me and b) hookers don't have particularly strong sex drives. But if that's in Ella's character, then it's in character for her. Makes me dislike her, though.
|
cmoore0013
Unregistered User
(4/6/06 9:20 pm)
|
Song
All rights will be finalized soon, so that's not a big deal.
Ella isn't particularly saying that a sexual person is evil, she hates her stepfamily because they are cruel and mean people. Her mean personality only comes out when she is around them. I was just sick of Cinderella never objecting to anything, so maybe in turn I made her too roudy, but I just have her do what I think most people in that situation would do.
|
|
